While I was up late once again applying for jobs at all the usual haunts and working on home work for my Cyber Security Degree; I took a giant leap of faith in humanity. When I was younger I always believed in good would triumph over evil, the honorable would win out. That it was always about strong faith and fortitude. I tell you, being in my family you get raised with that. Though as I watch over two of my children tonight sleeping and I listen to my wife asleep… I feel defeated.
For almost a year I have fought to regain a job. I have struggled with what happened. After being to every lawyer in my area of the state and everyone wanting a retainer to fight for me… All the admitting I have a case, but its “high risk” so they want their money up front. So, injustice is served and cannot be fought against because money. That thing we are all slaves too in some way. For me and mine, we are barely treading water, we lost our car, we are about to lose our house. Its so expense driving hours to specialists for our children multiple times a month. I don’t even have the money to file for bankruptcy to at least get people to stop trying to squeeze blood from a stone. I digress.
My point is over the last three years since we left the middle of the state, life has just disintegrated for us. My view of humanity has crumbled. I used to believe people were innately good. Now, I wonder what game someone is hustling when they approach me.
I don’t like that one bit. I want my faith back. I want our lives back.
I stay up hunting for jobs, I freelance but when you work out the math it is not even minimum wage. Trust me I am not complaining about that. I am thankful for having someone who helps us, and I help them, and we can barter like that. The reality is though, my family needs more.
So, I took a leap of faith tonight and on a wild hair put up a go fund me. I put it up for what would be enough to get the house straight and then file bankruptcy to get on I guess it is a 5-year plan to pay everyone else. We’d still need help with some of the medical expense, but I figured if I started there that maybe, just maybe the positivizes would roll on and that elusive job could be right around the corner.
So, in that vein, here is the link to the campaign.
PS: to those following me on SteemIT, I am sorry I haven’t been around to respond. I really goofed up and I can’t get back into my account. ☹ I applied for a new one but it has not been approved yet.
aka Soulbound Heart